Religion... The Greatest Comic Ever Written

I hate organised religion... I can't stand it. I do not want to let Jesus into my life. Why would people knock on my door with the very noble intention of trying to save my soul from eternal damnation in hell? Why would I go to my local church for a ‘Faith Lift’? Why would I want to go to a rock concert with no drugs, no drink and no bad language of any kind!!!

After listening to Christian hip hop I came to the conclusion that I will never do it again. With lyrics like "Don't treat woman like objects you fool" you can see why. That is not what hip hop is about! Women are objects, and I’ll treat them as such. Fool!

Class? I Should Start A Fucking Charm School

Now you may believe that class has something to do with money, and that I'm being a snob by discluding half of the female population of the world, but I assure you it hasn't.

Class is something you either have or have not and I firmly believe it. Living in Liverpool I am bombarded with this shit everyday. All doing the things listed below. Is it any wonder I prey on naive virgins with rich parents?

 I like a woman with class. I don't deny it. When I see a girl lacking class I’m completely turned off. I don't care how 'up for it' they are or how 'animal like' they are in the sack. Without class my beast stays firmly in its cage. So good news, if you are one of these girls. Here is some advice.

1) Don't yell to your friends half way up the road... If you really have to yell to get their attention, DON'T under any circumstances; continue the conversation by yelling without making an effort to walk closer to the other person. No one wants to hear your conversation shouted back and forth from different ends of the road.