B-team test of the senses

This week B-team members have been subjected to a variety of small tests to determine the quality of their senses and reflexes. First was the test for reflexes which involved dropping five open cans of lager over each member-the aim to catch as many as possible. Iron Fist and Raging Horse surpassed this challenge in the only way possible-pure initiative. By steeling the key to the store cupboard and drinking everything in sight (even the medicine cabinet) the test was technically a success and nothing was actually spilt.



This made the next two tests incredibly interesting, namely Dart throwing to test eyesight and co-ordination and the walking in a straight line test. After the results of the dart throwing, iron fist single headedly ensured that not only did Raging horse and iron fist fail the walking in a straight line test, but everyone unlucky to be within throwing distance and the vague vicinity of anything that looked like a dartboard also found the test increasingly difficult.

The Final test was designed to test the sense of smell; in this case our trained badgers and our roles are reversed. B-team members had to successfully track a badger by cent for 200 meters. Unfortunately this was conducted on a hot day and both B-team members found it impossible to ignore the smell of barbeques burning and both ended up gate-crashing different ones. Unfortunately while trying to recapture B-team members a herd of more than fifty trained badgers escaped to the country.

All tests have since been abandoned with scientists preferring to make an "EDUCATED GUESS" on the state of its member’s wellbeing and reports of fifty badgers terrorising takeaways all over the country have been swept under the carpet.


Note: No Animals of the Furry variety were harmed in this test!